I'm not sure why but the time was much harder to deal with than the previous two. I was trying not to get my hopes up but clearly I did since now that I am spotting I am an emotional wreck. I went back to my obsession with looking at other options (adoption, IVF, surrogacy etc.) but I came right back to the fact that this is the cheapest and best method for me. The earliest I would be able to try something else would be July... that is at least 7 or 8 cycles from now. What I need to do now is not worry about other options until they are actually available to me. "Normal" couples can take up to a year to conceive, so why should I (with known fertility issues!) take only three cycles?!?! I know that I just want to hurry up and be pregnant, especially since timing maternity leave (and my planned Disney trip!) involves having a baby by October or November. However, that still gives me three more cycles before timing is less than "ideal". And if I decide to come back here to work then when I start maternity leave doesn't matter, the end does but I can save up enough money to last me until I can start a new job. It's just really hard to see all these women here pregnant and having kids that are taken from them and put into care because drinking and doing drugs is more important to them. One teen just had a baby in April and then got pregnant again her next cycle! Of course she is having sex, not inseminating and maybe I need to do more inseminations? Maybe if next cycle doesn't work I will go back to two (or maybe even do three) inseminations. At only $75 an insemination it's not like it's breaking the bank. I also need to work harder on losing weight. Although it's not proven that weight causes fertility issues (other than PCOS) and my doctor said my weight isn't an issue, I'd rather lose weight for me and baby. I know I can work harder on that, I know I need to stop my emotional eating. My spotting hasn't officially started yet, I only know that it will start soon because when I checked my cervix there was some blood in the cervical mucus. If my period is coming I want it to start tomorrow or Wednesday. Those would give the most idea days for the next insemination.
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About Me
I am 31, single, and been on my journey to becoming a single mother since 2013. I have struggled with infertility and I am now on the path to international adoption of a little girl with Down syndrome. Come join me on my journey to becoming a mother! Categories
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